Clever Exhusbands

A call came in from a woman indicating that there was a rolled up newspaper left in her mailbox and the ends had been burned. At first, we weren't too sure exactly what the crime could be. Perhaps, that someone went into her mailbox and left the paper because you're not supposed to open someones mailbox and tamper with its contents???
The woman proceeded to tell us that when she unrolled the newspaper she found it to be the classified section and she immediately knew who the culprit was. Apparently, she's recently divorced and her ex now has to pay alimony and he's upset about this so he left the newspaper classified section in her mailbox to hint around for her to get a job!!!
I was cracking up. And one of the hardest thing about my job is having to dispatch a call like the one above in a totally monotone, professional voice with no inflections and no variations. Because, according to the FCC and our SOP, we have to have the utmost professionalism when we go across the radio.
It's funny listening to the other dispatchers when they have to put out calls too. Last night we had to dispatch a call about some nudist in the area and no one was quite sure if you were allowed to say "nudist" over the radio!
It's always great, though, when you slip up. The other night I went to call out a deputy and I mistakenly said the wrong ID for him so instead of saying "Correction" like you're supposed to say I said, "Oops I mean...." which is funny but you're not supposed to say things like that.

I do miss getting all the crazy 911 calls, but this new position has its perks. The only downside is the fact that my ears feel like they're going bleed by the end of the night!!